This post will be a list of random thoughts that have made it to my journal in the past couple of days since I got home from my first trail run in the Buda mountains.
There are a bunch of run groups popping up recently in Budapest but to be honest none of them made me as excited as the Asics’ run series. The Hungarian FrontRunners introduced a beginner friendly trail running experience (so I thought LOL). It’s called ‘I show you a path’ and they guarantee you routes that are fun af, adventurous and challenging. I appreciate creativity and this is definitely a motivating idea. I had to be there. But first let me list a few reasons why I could have flaked.
- I was scared shitless that I won’t be able to keep up.
- These people are all experienced trail runners, who am I to show up there?
- Am I really wearing my Nike lunar glides for this run? They will judge me.
Thank god that I ignored my doubts. It’s just running, right?! I’ll survive. Besides two of my bad ass sheroes were there too for support and I knew that I wouldn’t be left to spend the night there by myself if we get lost 😉
We started running, beast mode kicked naturally. I was trying to pace myself to the front until we reached the first incline and I noticed people walking and taking it slow. That’s when self doubt hit me (for the first time of many). ‘what am I doing? These people are wearing trail shoes so they must know what the heck they are doing.. I should be smarter, stay in the back. I can’t burn myself out too soon. They will pass me later on..and I will look like a fool due to my ignorance.’ Sounds familiar? All the bull crap you can feed yourself. Since the girls I went with are far from staying in their comfort zones, we decided to go for it and push the pace. I figured that I might not finish with the front pack but sure as hell that I’ll try my best at least. The organizers weren’t kidding when they said that they will show us hidden path ways. We were literally running in deep bushes. That’s what those random trails seemed to my unexperienced eyes anyways 😀 Finally we reached a dirt road but we didn’t stay on it for long because obvy that would have been just too easy.. all of a sudden we stopped in front of a 90 degree (okay, maybe only 70) rock wall when the leader of the run casually announced that we are about to climb it. 100meters, no biggie. Now you have to understand that I’m a little chicken when it comes to heights but I guess runners high were in full effect by this point because I didn’t even give it a second thought just started climbing using my arms and hands to reach for branches and little holes in the stones so I can pull myself up.
As the run went on I was gaining confidence. But it was definitely a humbling journey. “Only a 9k”. Yeah, rightttt. Except that we were already a hour out there and my watch was showing barely 5k. We stopped many times to wait for each other which helped to recharge my mental supplies since I was arrogant enough to show up to the run without any fuel or water. “It’s only a 9k”. Yeah, sure.. The thirst was real yet the vibes were even more real! We were on our last climb, running, skipping, walking and I was questioning my fitness, I was questioning my training in general. My competitiveness was kicking me in the butt. By the time we made it to the sunset viewing point I was breathing heavier than a chain smoker. But the real work starts when it burns, when it hurts. Life happens on the other side of ordinary.
All those hashtag challengeyourself, hashtag girlpower shit what I always preach got a different meaning on Thursday. This might be a long post about a run but it made a huge impact on me and as much as I live for city trails I can’t wait to return to the woods.
The next day I was feeling surprisingly good so I decided to run 10k which I’m paying for today (two days later, delayed soreness almost knocked me down.. but I won). It’s okay tho, because nothing changes if nothing changes. It will all just make me stronger eventually 😉
Happy weekend, happy running! Thank you for reading!